Somewhere in My Past

I met you just tonight but I keep wondering why,
it seems I have always known you all my life.
I held you only once but I keep wondering why,
it seems I have held you forever.
I kissed you only once but I keep wondering why,
it seems I have kissed your lips so many times.
I know you only now but I keep wondering why,
it seems I have known you forever.

Can it be true?
Could I be wrong?

... that somewhere in my past I fell in love with you.
... and somewhere in my past there was also me and you.

Just the Way You Are

I like your sophistication,
I love your simplicity.
I like when you say hi,
I love your undying attention.
I like it when we are together,
I love it when we hold close.
I like the way you show affection,
I love it when you care.
I like when you see the best of me,
I love your acceptance of my flaws.
I like it when I see you smile,
I love it when its for me.
I like it when I miss you,
I love it when I love you.

Crossroad

In the middle,
I see both ends of the world.
At the top,
I see the vision of my being.
But now,
I am here at the corner of my life...
defying gravity,
crossroad that is.

And the next best thing,
is yet to reveal.

The Tale of the Last Prince

Once upon a time....












And they live happily ever after.

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?”

The Lord replied,
“The times when you have seen only one set of footprints in the sand,
is when I carried you.”

Reflection

When you speak, honesty is important.
Deceitful words and lies are not allowed.
Rather than talking too much, it is better to speak less.
Speak the truth. Do not twist the facts.
Cunning words, foul language and bad habits
must be avoided at all costs.

What you have not seen with your own eyes,
Do not readily tell to others.
What you do not know for sure,
Do not easily pass on to others.

When asked to do something that is inappropriate or bad,
Do not promise lightly.
If you do, you will be wrong either way.

When speaking, make the words clear and to the point.
Do not talk too fast or mumble.
Some like to talk about the good points of others.
While some like to talk about the faults of others.

If it is none of your business, do not get involved.
When you see others do good deeds,
Think about following their example.

Even tough your own achievements are still far behind those of others,
You are getting closer.

When you see others do wrong,
Immediately reflect upon yourself.
If you have made the same mistake, correct it.
If not, be extra cautious not to make the same mistake.

When your morals, conduct, knowledge and skills,
are not good as others,
You should encourage yourself to be better.

Start the new year right life-a-holics!

Random Thoughts

Food: Western
Color: Green, Blue and Purple
Singer: Neyo (Year of the Gentleman Album)

Are ya kind? Selective kindness. But in terms of material things, I am kind of giving and sharing.

Whats your favorite thing in your bag? My notebook, I guess. Its my life.

What was the last thing that you heard that pissed you off? Can I give a paradox answer? Haha. Maybe unexpected silence.

Can you dance? Yes. Lol. But No. Haha. I reserve this dance to my future ehem.

One word to describe you right now? Stranded.

What's your favorite thing to do? Cycling, camping, thinking... working zzzz.

Are you happy now? There's lacking but nearly complete. I hope soon, I would. Anybody wants to offer to complete me? Lol. You can reach me at 929XXXX. Lol!

What is in mind at the moment? Complicated things. (Coz im confused mah!)

Do you know someone who likes you? Haha. So teeny question. Lol. YES! Whoa! Haha.

Who's your enemy in your house? Nah! I'm a good boi!

Do you like unexpected visitors? Never. But with very few exceptions. Selected people only.

What will make you smile at night? My star above. :) Really, I do have.

Do you jam a lot? Inside my room :)I am a homebody.

Who are your companions when you jam? Mac and Me... and I. Haha. Emo :)

Do you easily fall in-love? Next question please. Haha. Sh***t.

Do you sometimes get angry at yourself? Yea :( For some uncontrollable involuntary things I ought to do and feel but I can't fight and say NOOOOOOO! Dooooonnnnttt!

Did you ever cry in front of a person? Yes :) I don't mind. It won't make u a lesser man.

Are you sweet? I hope I am. One thing I am sure about, I am sincere when I do things.

Do you like pissing people? You have my attention if I am interested with you. So if I am pissing you, you know what it means.. haha.. but don't over analyzed yea. haha.

Did someone already hurt you? Yes :( And its called Karma?

Was there someone who almost committed suicide because of you? Next question.

What do you like the most - autumn, winter, spring or summer? Spring

Is life treating you fair? Sometimes yes. Sometimes no. Maybe. Argh.

Do you sing? Yea. Practicing. Reserved to my future ehem.

Do you pray? I love GOD. Im HIS No. 1 fan!

Blah! Blah! Blah!

Towering Lovers

They met on a perfect day.
They seemed perfect for each other.
And it was the perfect time to fall in love.
It was the perfect love story.
But can there really be a perfect love story?

The Sound of Silence

Tonight is an isolated night amongst others. The sky is starry like tiny lights inviting for a party. My star up there stands out as it glows brighter than the others. I am happy that tonight it regains its glow. It survived the night even with the absence of the moonlight. That's how I stand out tonight.

This heartbeat melodiously envelopes the background. It dominates the sound of silence tonight along with the waves in the river and the blows of the wind here at the beach.

Tonight is indeed an isolated night amongst others.

The Mask of a False Lover

Life and love always joke at me. I assume. There comes a point in my life when everything seems so well and good, each morning is a promise, so amazing and yet at the end of the day I realized it just fooled me. Yes, it deceives me several times.

How can I ease the pain if the only medicine that can cure me is also the medicine that poisons me. What a big paradox. Traumatic love as they say, and sometimes its even unbearable.

It turned my days into nights. Sometimes, hoping not for another traumatic days to come. But, I realized that life is worth fighting for and love is not worth dying, for a person who doesn't even deserve from the start. There will always be a masks unrevealed for every person. Deceiving. Unpredictable. So, I should just learn and thankful for making me stronger by making me fall... fall out of place.

Now, I may hardly move on, its still fresh, but I believe that life has an inter-connected happenings that would lead me towards my destined eternal happiness.

And then... I write another story of my life and love and i hope this time it deceives no more.

My Valentine Dream

Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.

Like my grandparents, they had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from their branches they found that they were one tree and not two.

My Valentine Dream.

Compassion. Obsession. Diffusion.

These are the 3 factors you have to deal with when you made a decision to love. You have to be compassionate with your partner, if not, what's the point of loving?

Compassion signifies oneness. In a relationship, I believe, two individuals fuse as one. You love your partner without knowing why or how, you just love unconditionally. You share even you don't have anything, you give even without taking..

Along the way, without actually knowing it, you become obsess to your partner.. you'll never let a day pass without seeing him or her; you talk over the phone without recognizing the passing of time, you text till you both drop to sleep." and that's not all to it, you still chat over instant messaging, and you are connected in online communities like, Facebook, Friendster and Multiply.. and when you are together somewhere, there's no urge to go home even if it's already too late and you keep on saying goodbye but no one wanted to leave first and when you actually parted ways, you miss each other as if you never spent long hours together.. Obsession or not? Your partner never leaves your mind, whatever you do, wherever you are, so there, obsession.

But it has been said that some good things never last, no matter how colorful and promising your love life is, just like any relationships in history, it is bound to end and take its final bow. Here comes diffusion. You have to learn to detach yourself from anything that would remind you of your partner and even to him or her.. That's the way things has to be.. "letting go was never an easy thing" and "letting go was just another way of saying I will always love you so".. You simply have to let go and get hurt, get hurt until it hurts no more. Nights will be spent wondering what went wrong in your relationship, hugging your pillow so tight wishing you're together again, and you'll wake up feeling so alone and cursing the sun why it still dawned on you, wanting darkness to envelope you for eternity since losing your partner means death, and yes, we all died for so many times in our lives.

Weekdays

On Monday, I say hi.
You return back with a smile.
Heart rate increases
Temperature rises
Enjoying the night
Love at first sight.

On Tuesday, you say hi.
I return back with a smile.
Conversations flourish
Similarities unleash
Conflicts are on the same ground
Love on the second round.

On Wednesday, we say hi.
We return back with a smile.
Gravity is uncontrollable.
Intensity is insatiable.
Things are on its full blow.
Love on the third row.

On Thursday, I say hi.
I hear no reply.
Paranoia boggles my mind.
Maybe you need more time?
I could hardly tell.
Love on the fourth level.

On Friday, I realize
How could I be so blind?
With this feeling I have inside.
Is rushing like a suicide
Commitment is not a race.
Love on its deciding phase.

On Monday, we find attraction.
On Tuesday, a lavishing attention
On Wednesday, an intensifying passion
On Thursday, an intimate contradiction
On Friday, a commitment of delusion
But on weekends, may we find our final destination?

The Indestructible Lover

I believe that in order for you to be totally happy, you need to give yourself a little respect. I believe in order for you to appreciate things more, you have to give yourself a little more time.I believe that the most exciting things on earth are just simple things and you just tend to ignore them as they are overshadowed by a lot of complications boggling your mind. I believe that when things aren’t meant to be, even how much effort you exert, it will never change things. I believe that one of the most humiliating things on earth is to beg a person to love you back. And another degrading thing would be a person to love you out of pity or just-for-fun or may be for that time-being-alone-and-afterwards-forget-about-it. I believe that was not love after all.

I accept the fact that not all things you want it would be given to you. I accept the fact that I am too stupid to love you by losing my self-esteem. I accept the fact that even you do not care at all, I am still here waiting for some attention from you. I accept the fact that I care about you even though I do not see any sign of any concern from you. I accept the fact that I might already love you but I accept the fact that would only be a wishful thinking.

But I believe that there will come a time that I grow tired doing all of these to you. I believe, as the song goes, there will come a time that I won’t even be there for you, I will be happy somewhere, even if I still care. I believe someone will come my way to teach me on how to respect myself by giving me that person’s unconditional love which from a very long time I expected from you. I accept the fact that I may be stupid now by loving you but sooner and later I will be fine and get up from my fall and stand a better indestructible lover.